Conventions

There's something you need to know about me: I'm a heathen when it comes to food preparation and dinner parties.

• I don't chifonnade, and I hardly ever julienne, but I do like to make sure my herbs are sliced into ribbon-thin strips, and that my vegetables are cut into matchstick-sized pieces.
• I don't brunoise leeks, but I have been known to finely dice them.
• While I could set up a fairly complete mise en place for each meal I'm preparing, I prefer to get out what I need before I start cooking, then put it away when I'm done.
• I don't always prepare elaborate Hors d'ouvres to serve to my guests before we sit to supper; instead, I set out a few simple appetizers, and we amuse ourselves with light-hearted, and hopefully witty, badinage.
• While I know how to set a formal table, I usually lay out only what the meal will require.

Here's the point: while I know how to prepare, plate, and present just about anything, I'd prefer to focus on my guests, and not on making sure they know the correct technical term for each step of the preparation, or that they're using the correct utensil for each course. If we're in the kitchen together and someone truly wishes to help, I don't want to explain the difference between coarse and fine chop, dicing, mincing, and julienning: I'd rather hand them a knife and say, "see how those carrots are cut? Do that to the zucchini."

And when it comes to serving and eating, while I enjoy setting out grilled Tilapia on bone china with linen serviettes at every place, I also enjoy sitting down at a friend's house to barbequed beef ribs on plastic plates, especially when they're providing a huge pile of paper napkins and handy wipes to clean off fingers and chins.

When all is said and done, food is about life, life is about laughter, and laughter is a part of love. Concern yourself more with making sure that you and your guests are comfortable.

The rules of social etiquette can be learned as you go, but your guests are more likely to remember that they shared a pleasant time at your home than they are to remember that you served an Oregon Pinot in glasses meant for a California Cabernet Sauvignon.